Drowning...

It was midsummer but cold, down by the river at 1am. I had a woollen jumper and jeans over my nightgown, but I still shivered.

The moon was high and almost full. I wanted to stand still and gaze at its reflection in the water. All of a sudden I wanted to be on my own, for Claudine and Albert to be far away. But Claudine called me over her shoulder. 'Hurry up, Marie. Albert will think we're not coming.'

Albert was already there when we arrived - sitting on the bank of the Willow Pool, splashing his feet in the water. His skin looked almost blue. His top half was naked, though I assumed he was wearing his swimming trunks.

Claudine whipped off her jumper. Underneath were her bra and pants. Then she dived, entering the water with a mighty splash. Albert followed her and soon they were laughing and splashing, with Claudine giving the occasional shriek.

I couldn't swim. I still can't.I remember wondering why the hell I'd ever agreed to this stupid plan. Why wasn't I tucked up in my warm bed at La Maison Rouge, dreaming of flying nuns and angels with golden wings?

 Did I really care that much about keeping Albert from Claudine's clutches?

The answer, though, was yes, of course I did.

'Jump in, Marie,' yelled Claudine. 'Come on, it stops being cold when you get used to it.'

'I can't swim,' I reminded her.

'It's not deep. I can stand up - just about.'

Albert spoke for the first time. 'We'll help you,' he cried. 'I'll teach you to swim. It's easy - just sit on the edge and slide in. I'll be there to catch you.'

His tones was cajoling and somehow it was impossible to resist. I did as he told me, slipping into the water close to my favourite willow, the one I called the twisting tree.

My head went under. My feet searched for the bottom, but all I could feel were weed fronds and, beneath them, slimy mud. Nothing to support me...

I tried to scream, but inhaled water instead. My heart pounded. Claudine and Albert had gone; they were leaving me to drown.

Invitation to the Willow Pool

At first, Albert seemed completely immune to Claudine's charms. I was hugely relieved by this, because he was mine. Albert and I had been friends as long as either of us could remember, and we didn't need this newcomer stirring things up and spoiling everything.

Then, one evening on the way back to our rooms from bedtime prayers, Claudine said: 'I've asked Albert to meet me tonight, down by the Willow Pool.'

'Have you?' I tried to sound as though I didn't care.

She gave a little smile. She really was pretty, was Claudine, with those huge dark eyes. That was part of the problem. I didn't really think Albert would be able to resist her charm.

'He promised he'd be there.'

'That's very nice for you both.'

'Oh, I don't know. I think it might be rather dull. just the two of us. Would you like to come along?'

I thought she was teasing me until I saw the expression on her face.

'I don't know,' I said. 'It's dangerous, sneaking out at night. Henriette never sleeps, as far as I can tell. What if she hears us and reports us to Josette?'

Claudine tossed her head and gave a little sniff. 'What's the worst they can do? Honestly, Marie, you're such a scaredy-cat. Those ridiculous sisters can't hurt you, you know.'

I'd never really questioned the sisters' authority. Not sure what sort of child that makes me, but I hadn't. I'd never felt the need to, not until tonight.

Suddenly it felt very important to keep an eye on what went on between Claudine and Albert. 'OK,' I said. 'I'll come.'

Claudine's face broke into a big smile. 'Wonderful,' she said. 'Let's make some plans.'

Claudine and Albert

I'd never wanted a boyfriend, before Claudine arrived. Albert, the gardener's son, was just my friend. We'd known each other from way back and had always gone off exploring together, down by the river among the weeping willows, or further afield, chasing each other along one of the lanes that led to the sea.

For years, he'd been my only friend.

Clauidne made me see Albert differently. 'He's beautiful,' she told me. 'I want to kiss him. I'm going to make him die for me.'

'What d'you mean, die for you?' I didn't like the sound of this.

'You know. Want me so much he could die.'

'You mean...?'

'You're such an innocent.' She pulled her face into a snarl. 'Still stuck at the age of eight. I mean sex, of course.'

'But Albert's just...'

'Just what?'

'Just a kid. Too young for all that.'

Claudine was half-smiling now, her full lips curling, her eyes not quite joining in. 'We'll see about that,' she said. 'But I'll need your help.'

We were out of doors, in bright summer sunshine, but I felt a cold draught blowing round my legs and I began to shiver.